70 Crappy (however sensible) Christmas Presents for Hikers |

(Observe: This 12 months’s record comprises a lot of your outdated favourites, together with 20 new additions. I notice that December 24 may be very late for a Christmas reward publish, however what the hey, this text has by no means actually been concerning the pressies. Blissful Christmas to everybody, and will your festive season be stuffed with peace, marvel, and at the very least two or three stomach laughs. Cheers, Cam). 

Within the 12 years since its launch, the most well-liked articles on The Mountain climbing Life haven’t been about out of doors abilities, backpacking tools, or journey studies from far-flung locales. Nope, they’ve been about crappy hiker presents which you could decide up for lower than 5 {dollars}.

From Walmart with Love.

Due to this fact, after a three-year hiatus, I’ve determined to mud off the festive season favorite and provides my thrifty readership extra of what they appear to like. With out additional ado, if cash’s tighter than a hairpin flip however for some inexplicable purpose, you’re feeling a way of obligation to offer your hiker buddies one thing, think about the next 70 reward concepts for underneath $5 $10.

1.  A Field of Ziplocs – Just about everybody takes Ziplocs (or equivalents) backpacking. However let’s be trustworthy, nothing says, “I don’t give a shit about you” like plastic baggage for Christmas.

2.  Path Patches – Splendid reward for hikers that need everybody to know that they’ve thru-hiked the Appalachian or Pacific Crest Path however aren’t fairly able to take the calf tattoo plunge.

3.  Socks – For lower than $10, you might have to go artificial and even cotton. No Merino Wool or any of these different fancy blends. If attainable, attempt to make your alternative seasonal-appropriate. You realize those with little Christmas timber and snowmen on them……..possibly some reindeer as nicely.

4.  Dental Floss – Along with serving to to maintain your tooth clear, uber-strong dental floss can be utilized as thread for gear repairs within the subject, an emergency substitute for a damaged shoelace, and even a makeshift clothesline underneath your shelter at night time.

5.  Bandana –  You’ll be able to usually discover these multi-purpose gems on the backside of outside retailer cut price bins. Potential makes use of embody: towel, water filter, neck safety, pot cleaner, tent drier, pee rag for she-hikers, hanky, makeshift gaiters, helpful to put on in your face throughout sand storms, and helpful in case you are low on funds and determine to rob a comfort retailer.

Bandana………..7-Eleven mode.

6. Hacky Sacks (set of 6)– I’ve a couple of hippy hiker mates that love these little baggage. At simply over $3 every they signify wonderful worth, weigh solely a few ounces, take up nearly no house in your pack, and might make for a enjoyable diversion throughout lengthy days on path. With each third set bought, consumers will obtain a complimentary eBook copy of The Light Artwork of Bong and Pipe Making.

7.  Rest room Paper – In the event that they aren’t too choosy with reference to softness/high quality, $10 price of lavatory roll can doubtlessly final the giftee all of a multi-month thru-hike…………at the very least when supplemented with the stuff they may pinch from inns, eating places, fuel stations, and classier public restrooms.

8. Titan (or Voile) Straps – Used to carry collectively two trekking poles when pitching mid-style shelters in doubtlessly stormy circumstances. I used this strong setup throughout my latest journey to the Faroes/Greenland/Lapland (see photograph beneath).

MLD Duomid, Arctic Circle Path, Greenland.

9.  Loopy/Tremendous Glue – Helpful for sleeping mat repairs, small holes in tents, and at a pinch, even cuts and blisters.

10.  Tent Pegs – If you wish to go fancy, for a $10er you may most likely decide up a couple of titanium stakes. Alternatively, you should purchase six to eight of the Military Disposal Retailer selection.

11.  Plastic Disposable Kitchen Gloves – You should buy 100-count packs (or extra) of those for a music on Amazon. They can be utilized as a part of a layering system to your arms when mountain climbing in extraordinarily chilly and moist circumstances. For particulars, see “Easy methods to Preserve Your Palms Heat Whereas Mountain climbing in Chilly Climate.”

12.  Baking Soda – One other wonderful multi-purpose merchandise that extra hikers ought to learn about. Makes use of embody toothpaste, deodorant substitute, cleansing pots and drink bottles, antacid for upset stomachs, and helps to take away foot odour from sneakers. As well as, baking soda assists in relieving itching related to insect bites, bee stings, and poison ivy/oak.

12. Head Web – Weighs solely an oz. or two and could be a sanity saver in the course of the peak of bug season. Certainly, when the midges, mozzies, or sandflies are swarming, I’m unsure there’s a higher value-for-money merchandise in a single’s backpacking equipment.

13.  $10 Goodwill Present card – Polyester Hawaiian-style shirts, solar clothes, saggy shorts, 100wt fleece – the record of cut price basement hiker choices are nearly infinite. Keep away from socks, underwear, and bandanas. There’s low-cost, and there’s simply plain cheesy.

Tatu Jo – Legendary long-distance hiker and long-time connoisseur of thrift retailer mountain climbing shirts (photograph courtesy of Whitney LaRuffa).

14.  Hand Sanitizer – I haven’t had a case of the trots within the “backcountry” (so to talk) since 1999. I believe that the diligent use of hand sanitizer is a part of the rationale. I all the time preserve a small bottle helpful in one of many shoulder strap pockets on my backpack (together with sunscreen and lip balm).

15.  Folgers Basic Decaf Immediate – None of that fancy Through stuff from Starbucks. The truth that it’s decaf leaves the giftee in little doubt as to how you actually really feel about them.

16.  Simpsons Bic Lighters – Customised Bic lighters that includes characters and scenes from The Simpsons. Whereas cooking up a feast at day’s finish, these little flame throwers are certain to deliver a smile to your fellow hiker’s dials. And bear in mind…….

17.  Six-Pack of Ramen – A culinary staple for backpackers. Should you actually wish to make an effort, choose singles with quite a lot of flavours.

18.  Tyvek Groundsheet – This would possibly truly value you nothing if you’ll find a bit in a development website dumpster. Customise the scale for the giftee. It’s the little issues that rely.

19.  Reconstituted Talenti Ice Cream Container – A much-loved mainstay of the cold-soaking crowd.  The Talenti container sports activities a large mouth, a screw-top lid, and naturally, the not-to-be-scoffed-at bonus of a (semi)tasty pint of ice cream.

20.  Diaper Pins – This one is courtesy of long-time subscriber Gerry B, who wrote that “old style diaper pins are a lot bigger and stronger than normal security pins, and I preserve a pair hooked to my packs for drying socks or different items of clothes.”

21. Dr. Bronner’s Cleaning soap: Useful travel-sized selection pack. Weight-conscious hikers can repackage into mini-dropper bottles (see beneath). Not solely are they reasonably priced and sensible, however gifting Dr.Bronner’s is a none-too-subtle manner of claiming, “mate, you really want to work in your hygiene.”

22.  Mini Dropper Bottles (2 Pack) – For nearly twenty years, I’ve repackaged my hand sanitizer and Aquamira in these tiny bottles for all of my backcountry journeys.

23.  Trash Compactor Bag – When bought in packets of 10 or 20, these infants normally work out to between $1 and $2 a pop. It puzzles me as to why anybody would spend $40 plus for a dyneema pack liner, when a trash compactor bag weighs about the identical (a tiny bit heavier) and performs simply as nicely for a fraction of the worth.

24. Zipper Cleaner – Conserving tent zippers clear charges simply behind laundering your sleeping bag on the record of issues hikers are susceptible to overlook on the finish of an extended backpacking season. Zipper upkeep is particularly vital if a lot of your mountain climbing is completed in coastal or desert environments (Tip: At all times be mild with zippers; by no means drive a caught zipper).

25.  Condoms – Along with the apparent, the outdated Johnny bag will also be used as an emergency water holder (as much as 2 liters) in case one among your bottles develops a leak. In addition they come in useful as a water-proof cowl to your telephone throughout river crossings. It’s even attainable to make use of the contact display by way of the latex – helpful for protected sexting.

Whether or not you might be sexting or fording a difficult river, if it’s not on, it’s not on.

26.  Bag Balm – Bag Balm now is available in sensible travel-sized 1/4 oz tubes. Not solely does these items works wonders on thigh and bum chafe, however it additionally is useful in case you are overcome by the urge to take advantage of a cow whereas out on path (i.e. Which was its unique function when developed again in 1899).

27.  Titanium Stitching Scissors – I’ve a few gram weenie hiker mates who love this stuff. They tip the scales at solely 0.3 oz, and when you add the mini-tweezers from the Swiss Military Basic, you’ve a gossamer weight combo (0.4 oz), which ought to cowl nearly your entire restore and tick elimination wants whereas out within the subject.

28. 3M Micropore Tape – Breathable paper medical tape. Adheres nicely. I’ve used it for years as a substitute of band-aids and different adhesive strips.

29.  Ibuprofen – Vitamin “I”. A hurting hiker’s finest good friend. May be discovered in lots of (if not most) hikers’ First-Help kits. Overlook concerning the identify manufacturers resembling Advil and go generic. For $10 you may normally decide up a 100-count bottle at most main supermarkets.

30.  Backcountry Bidet / Reconstituted Sports activities Drink Bottle (600ml) – Low-cost and multi-purpose. You’ll be able to decide one up at any petrol/fuel station. Search for bottles with a flip-cap spout. Present you care by together with the next directions and warnings on an accompanying Submit-it be aware:

A. Be sure you fill the bottle to the highest earlier than use, as roughly solely the primary 200 ml are squirtable;

B. Quick, sharp squeezes fired at an upward angle of 45° work finest, and;

C. Professional Tip: Don’t put the spout too near your freckle, as accidents can occur, and there’s nothing worse than discovering poo floaties in your consuming water over the course of the mountain climbing day.

A sports activities drink bottle and 4 squares of TP are all you want to your morning constitutional.

31. Bleach – Overlook about these fancy filters and chlorine dioxide drops. Bleach tastes horrible and will not be very efficient combatting giardia and crypto, however what the hey, for $10 you should purchase sufficient to final you a few thru-hikes after which put your financial savings in the direction of a course of Fasigyn.

32. Inflatable Pillow / Wine field bladder – The redneck’s backcountry pillow. For bogan bonus factors and a surefire thumper of a headache the next day, pack in a full field and drink all of it on the primary night time of your journey.

33. Security Sun shades – A number of completely different choices. Go for one that gives good UV safety. You’ll be able to usually decide them up for round $10 a pair on-line or at {hardware} shops.

34.  Electrolyte Tablets – Particularly useful when mountain climbing in sizzling temperatures and/or for people that recurrently endure from muscle cramps.

35. Ultralight Backpackin’ Suggestions – Greater than a decade after it was printed, Mike Clelland’s Ultralight Backpackin’ Suggestions nonetheless charges as probably the most informative and entertaining books on easy methods to lighten your pack weight.

36. Make America Nice Once more cap – Sensible and crappy. Regarding the former high quality, the hat’s brim helps to maintain the solar’s damaging rays off your face. As for the crappy half…….nicely………..

37.  Hand Rake (Set of two) – Talking of the porn-star-hushing, document-squirreling, disinfectant-boosting, tax-avoiding, NFT-hawking, election-denying, riot-fanning, wannabee-Greenland-purchasing, former Commander Bankrupt In Chief, one among Trumpy’s most memorable recommendations was to observe Finland’s instance in serving to to maintain America’s “forests flooring clear.” Hikers can do their half by selecting up a pair of those light-weight leaf scoopers for his or her subsequent backcountry tour. They weigh underneath 12 oz a pair and are simple to strap onto the again of your pack when not in use. With each second pair bought, consumers will obtain both a “Rake America Nice Once more” or “I Love Finland” bumper sticker.

Leaf scoopers/hand rakes are an important choice for both the yard or your subsequent backpacking journey.

Wish to go the additional mile in forest fireplace prevention? This Finnish woman reveals us how by caring for the forest flooring close to her dwelling.

37. Beer Koozie – Multi-purpose merchandise. Emergency mitten, storage to your DSLR lenses, paw protector in case your canine steps on a cactus, and helps to maintain that post-hike beer that you simply left in your automotive refreshingly lukewarm. Earn gram weenie bonus factors by buying it from one among your favorite ultralight cottage gear firms.

38.  Therm-a-rest Z-Lite Seat Pad  – When your outdated Z-Lite has gone flatter than gander’s arch, lob off a few segments and reward them to a mountain climbing buddy seeking a bit extra back-country consolation throughout their noon breaks. Alternatively, large spenders can splash out on a new Z-Seat Pad and share the posterior love amongst three of their hiker buddies.

39.  Frogg Toggs / DriDucks Rain Pants – The whole Frog Toggs go well with will value round $22. Nevertheless, whereas the jacket could also be a useful choice for a lot of three-season backpacking excursions, the pants (est. worth $0.10) are about as sturdy as a pair of Altras on something however manicured trails. Regardless of the setting, chances are high you’ll blow out the crotch, bottom, or rip a gap in one of many legs inside a few days of leaving the trailhead.

Frog Toggs pants within the subject (photograph from BWCA.com).

40.  Mylar Blanket (Pack of 10) – A cut price at lower than a greenback a pop. Along with being utilized in emergencies, house blankets will also be employed as a light-weight floor sheet, signaling mirror, and makeshift tarp.

41.  Baskin & Robbins Pink Spoon –  Should you order a sundae at Baskin & Robbins, it comes with a semi-durable, difficult-to-lose, long-handled pink plastic spoon. I used one among these for 2000 miles on the Pacific Crest Path in 2012.

42.  The Fellowship of the Ring – That is the primary a part of “The Lord of the Rings” trilogy, and for my cash, the perfect thru-hiking story ever written. You’ll be able to typically decide up a used copy for lower than a fiver on Amazon. Mainly, it’s the story of a various bunch of men who went out for a multi-month stroll, bought as much as a number of memorable adventures, met some cool path angels, took some zero days, had some variations of opinion with reference to route choice, break up into separate teams, stood by one another when occasions have been robust, completed their journeys at completely different termini, and, lastly, met up for celebratory post-hike beers on a subject known as Cormallen at journey’s finish.

The boys from the Fellowship with the Misty Mountains within the background.

43.  John Muir’s Works – You’ll be able to decide up both a paperback or Kindle model of “The Yosemite” and “My First Summer time within the Sierra” for lower than $5 on Amazon. Greater than three many years after first studying Muir’s works as an adolescent, he stays one among my favorite wilderness writers.

44.  Tenacious Tape – An improve from duct tape for out-in-the-field gear repairs to your tent, rain jacket, or wind shirt

45.  Mini Cube – This one is courtesy of my good friend, Liz “Snorkel” Thomas, backpacking sage, creator, and Queen of City Through-hiking. In accordance with Snorks, “5 mini-dice weigh in at grams and supply hours of leisure for hikers trapped in a tent or shelter on a wet or snowy day. Good for Yahtzee, Farkel, and the rest you can also make up.” A 100-pack will set you again $5.

46.  PeakFinder App – This advice is from my outdated mate, Paul Magnanti (Pmags). Whereas mountain climbing in Colorado’s Sangre de Cristo vary in 2016, Mags blew me away when he began randomly rattling off the names and altitudes of each mountain nearby. Simply once I thought he was taking the piss, he confirmed me the PeakFinder app on his telephone ($3.99 as of 2022). To make use of the app, merely level the digital camera at your mountain of alternative, and a panoramic drawing will overlay the picture and offer you all of the related particulars. It at present has data on greater than 950,000 peaks around the globe (Observe: Different helpful apps for hikers embody PlantNet (free, easy, quick, and correct plant identifications), SkySafari (simple to make use of astronomy information to the night time sky), and Knots 3D (take a wild guess).

PeakFinder App (photograph from peakfinder.org).

47. Nan Shepherd’s “The Dwelling Mountain”: Shepherd was a Scottish poet and nationalist who’s commemorated on the nation’s five-pound be aware. “The Dwelling Mountain” is Shepherd’s superbly written testomony to the fun and wonders of strolling in nature, particularly in her beloved Cairngorm mountains.

48.  Dehydrated Cocktails – Good for hip flask-carrying backpackers that wish to lengthen hiker midnight previous 9 pm. Taste choices embody Mango Margarita, Mint Mojito, and Blood Orange Mai Tai.

49. Customized Revenge Voodoo Doll – When sharing somebody’s path combine has left you with a debilitating case of the trots, otherwise you picked up somewhat greater than you bargained for throughout a wild night time at Path Days, reward your self one among these personalised light-weight dolls (3.2 oz / pins included). Certain they value a bit over $10, however it’s exhausting to place a value on a very good dose of path revenge.

Customized Revenge Voodoo Doll

50. Backpacking Expertise/Academic Books – A lot of the backpacking recommendation you see on YouTube is 90 p.c tip and 10 p.c iceberg. For folk simply entering into the game, I extremely suggest selecting up a handful of basic hiking-related texts, which can complement the time you spend out within the boonies in serving to to construct your backcountry ability set and data base.

51.  The underside half of a Platypus bladder – When your platy bladder is discoloured, more and more brittle, and the seam on the high has ruptured, minimize it in half and regift the underside half to an ultralight hiker good friend. They will then use it to scoop water from filthy puddles when mountain climbing in pink rock nation or alternatively make use of it as a poor man’s consuming vessel.

52. Plastic Bathe Curtain – Overlook about fancy supplies resembling Dyneema Composite Materials (DCF); the legendary Grandma Gatewood used a plastic bathe curtain for rain safety when she grew to become the primary lady to thru-hike the Appalachian Path in 1955. In doing so, she could have inadvertently change into the originator of the Poncho Tarp.

The legendary Grandma Gatewood.

53. Spam satchels – America’s favourite thriller meat. Cheap, long-lasting, and filled with fats and protein, (in principle) spam looks like it will be a very good choice for calorie-loading long-distance hikers. Till you truly style it. I throw up somewhat in my mouth simply serious about it.

54.  Mack’s Silicone Ear Plugs – Anti-snoring resolution. In accordance with their promo spiel, Mack’s “have been saving marriages since 1962.” Vital for anybody considering of going from hut to hut within the Alps or mountain climbing the Appalachian Path in the course of the common season (Observe: As a bonus, I can personally attest that Mack’s silicone plugs work nice within the pool as nicely, for these of us which are susceptible to swimmer’s ear infections).

55.  Beano Extremely – When your mountain climbing companion is overdoing it on the dehydrated beans, and his or her farts would make a skunk blush, provide them some Beano Extremely to chop issues off on the pass.

56. Croakies (or equal) – Helpful reward for noggin-perching sunglass wearers, resembling myself, that recurrently scratch or lose sun shades out within the boonies.

57.  Smartwater bottle – Light-weight (1.3 oz), lengthy, slim, clean sides, and fairly sturdy, Smartwater is the consuming vessel of alternative for a lot of weight-conscious backpackers.

58.  Spiky Therapeutic massage Ball– Light-weight and compact merchandise that helps to scale back muscle ache and stress within the toes, calves, hips, glutes, and shoulders. For somewhat additional cash, you may go for a lighter and extra environmentally pleasant cork choice from Rawology.

59.  Handsfree Umbrella Clamp – Practical accent for umbrella customers (particularly people who wield trekking poles) that clips onto nearly any shoulder strap.

Greg “Malto” Gressel on a dampish hike in New York’s Adirondack mountains (2015).

60. Paper Espresso Filters – Low-cost-as-chips merchandise that’s helpful for pre-filtering soiled or silty water.

61. Resort/Spa Slippers – Tipping the scales at round 70 gr/2.5 oz, lodge slippers are an inexpensive, gentle, compact, and cozy camp shoe choice. They’re additionally best for backcountry huts when it is advisable go away your mountain climbing sneakers on the door.

62. Sponges – Featherweight, multi-purpose merchandise that can be utilized as a pot cleaner, condensation dryer, and, when you’re actually determined, to absorb the final drops of water in a shallower-than-shallow pothole (Observe: A straw could be a greater choice for the final level).

63. Blaze Orange Vest (and hat) – Important equipment when mountain climbing throughout searching season in lots of locations within the US. Within the phrases of PMags (seen within the photograph beneath): “Carrying blaze orange is sweet for security; hunters recognize it, and it’s a respectful manner of sharing the outside amongst all customers.”

Yours really and Pmags throughout a 2014 journey within the Mount Evans Wilderness.

64. Foot File/Callus Remover – You’ll be able to usually decide foot recordsdata up for underneath $10, however for one thing as vital as your toes, I’d suggest spending a wee bit extra for a mannequin that’s going to do the job nicely and final for the lengthy haul. I purchased a Probelle a couple of years again, and it’s nonetheless going robust.

65. Nikwax Down Wash –  For arguably essentially the most cherished (and sometimes the costliest) merchandise in a backpacker’s equipment, it surprises me what number of people don’t take higher care of their sleeping bag/quilt. In a nutshell, laundering your bag or quilt yearly will assist it last more and insulate extra successfully (Observe: If you wish to go the additional yard, purchase the giftee a couple of tennis balls to assist within the drying course of).

66. Lint –  Makes for an important emergency fireplace starter. Empty the contents of your garments dryer’s lint catcher right into a tiny Ziploc bag. Throw in some further lint out of your stomach button simply to offer the reward a extra private contact.

Stomach lint extraction – Japanese fashion.

67. Packing Pod Pillow – I have a tendency to not use quite a lot of stuff sacks once I hike, however over the past couple of years, I’ve periodically introduced alongside a few SMD packing pods. Other than being helpful for organizational functions, these brightly colored pods are additionally the proper measurement to make use of as a pillowcase, filled with no matter clothes gadgets you’re not sleeping in.

68. 100 Wt Fleece – Sturdy, breathable, and moisture-resistant energetic put on. A superb value-for-money merchandise that (as a rule) has a spot in my backpacking equipment regardless of the setting or season. They’ll normally value somewhat over $10, however you may usually discover them on particular for underneath $20 or $30.

69. Mini Carabiners – Suggestions the dimensions at 0.1 oz/3 gr and can be utilized for guyline attachments, drying hooks, and hanging bear baggage. Poncho tarp customers can use them to make a fast transition from poncho to shelter mode when it’s raining.

70. Fanny Pack – Fanny packs are just like the fruitcakes of the backpacking world. They get quite a lot of shit, however on the finish of the day, you’ve bought to tip your cap to a utilitarian merchandise that merely refuses to go away. Talking of one thing/one that’s unimaginable to kill…………..

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